Once Stout was adopted by Bean's Dad (I still got to see him all the time as Stout's Dad lived right down the street), Mom got the next one of the fosters. Her name was Branwen.
She was a very pretty Husky, but as with all girl Huskies, she could be a real b*tch!!! (I know, I know, technically she is a b*tch since she's a female dog, but I mean that in the human sense of the word!!!) As you can see from the picture, she could have been a dogmodel (and boy did she know it).
She didn't stay that long as she adopted a really nice couple only a few weeks later, but she was there long enough to attend a few of my dogparties (here she is with Stout, me and Bean).
Unfortunately, as it is with the unreliable creatures that are humans, she had to come back to rescue due to no fault of her own. She did adopt a new set of parents though, and now lives (hopefully furever) with her new family.
After Branwen left, the next of the fosters came... this one only stayed for 3 days (he already had a family to adopt, but they had to pass the adoption tests), and I didn't get to play with him that much 'cause he was sick from being in dogjail. His name was Pippin.
Now, you're probably saying "Why, he doesn't quite look like a Husky!", and you're right! He was a Korean Jindo. You're also probably saying, "Why does he have lipstick kisses all over his face?" Well, that, my friends, is the result of the aforementioned Auntie HiDeeHo. She always used to do that to us, especially on our white fur since it showed up so well. Grrrrrrowwwrr... I hated it! I tried to destroy all the pictures of me with kisses on my face, but I'm sure there are some somewhere (my stoopid cousin Clemmie probably has them posted all over the Internet).
Anyway, Pippin came and went very quickly, and after him came (dum dum DUM) the evilest of the evil girldogs EVER...
(to be continued...)
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Story of me (part 2)
So, where did I leave off? I think it was talking about when I met Chloe and Brinkley that fateful day that I adopted my Mom. Here's a picture of the 3 of us receiving important CaNinja instructions...
Now, I know you're thinking, "Labs? The CaNinjas you spoke of are LABS?" But seriously, they have some impressive talents. Chloe (the brown one) is a black belt in Karate, and Brinkley... well, um... (honestly, I think Brinkley is only allowed at the CaNinja meetings because Chloe is so high in the ranks... he's my best pupfriend, but he's a little slow...)
So yeah, back to the story... from there it's pretty much your typical dog-meet-Mom scenario. I lived with my Mom in an apartment with Auntie HiDeeHo and got all kinds of attention and new toys. Auntie HiDeeHo is a total pushover, so I got away with ALL kinds of stuff with her! Harr harroooo. But, Mom's a little more wily; she never took an eye off of me! I had to stay in the dogbox (Mom called it a crate) when no one was home, but since we lived in an apartment and had no yard, I got to go for 3 walks a day! It was pretty cool, especially the walks around the lake where all the geese lived (I tried to get a few, but Mom always stopped me... sheesh). I did get to sleep on the bed with Mom back then, (mainly so she could keep her eye on me when she was sleeping... still don't know how she does that), but now I have my own bed (I like my space when I sleep, and Mom and the DeeLan take up too much room... maybe if they get that King sized bed Mom's always talking about...) It was a fun time of shredding toys and going to new places.
It took me a while to learn the ropes, but I got to spend all kinds of time at my Gram-Mom's house, and was introduced to the CaNinja society through Chloe. I thought it would be like that furever, but Mom had other plans. Next thing I know, Mom is packing up all our stuff, my dog toys, my bed, my dogbox, and she took us to this new house. Now, I was happy with the apartment, but this house had a YARD!!! It was a little yard, but still, I could go outside and lay in the sun, or snow, or dig big holes, or chase the stoopid bunnies out of my yard, or watch the other dogs walk by on the sidewalk next to the house. It was AWESOME! Only one catch came with the new house... the stoopid foster dogs. Sigh... there I was, the utmost center of attention of my Mom, and she decides to start bringing in this never-ending line of foster dogs. See, Mom had decided that since a husky rescue had helped me find her that she wanted to foster dogs so they could find their furever homes too. The first one was Stout (you remember, the goofy looking husky-mutt from my adoption... he had been adopted the day I was, but was returned a year later 'cause his new Mom was having a baby and didn't want him anymore... humans can be weird sometimes). He was fun, I'll give you that, but he had this annoying habit of trying to eat my head.
As you can see here the idiot is trying to fit my entire neck in his mouth. Not the brightest light on the billboard, but he was fun. He was adopted a little while later by Bean's Dad, who lived down the street. Bean's Dad (and this is just twisted) owned a dog wash. Now, I like Bean's Dad a lot, but what type of aberrant soul does it take to own an establishment made for nothing but the torture of poor, innocent dogs?!?!?!? Stout used to go with him the dog wash (but from what I hear, he never got washed there, he just ran the check-out counter... not surprising since we ARE a working breed...)
Okay... that's all for now. I need to go get ready for Mom to come home (as in, looking innocent and justwokenup by her coming in the door).
Now, I know you're thinking, "Labs? The CaNinjas you spoke of are LABS?" But seriously, they have some impressive talents. Chloe (the brown one) is a black belt in Karate, and Brinkley... well, um... (honestly, I think Brinkley is only allowed at the CaNinja meetings because Chloe is so high in the ranks... he's my best pupfriend, but he's a little slow...)
So yeah, back to the story... from there it's pretty much your typical dog-meet-Mom scenario. I lived with my Mom in an apartment with Auntie HiDeeHo and got all kinds of attention and new toys. Auntie HiDeeHo is a total pushover, so I got away with ALL kinds of stuff with her! Harr harroooo. But, Mom's a little more wily; she never took an eye off of me! I had to stay in the dogbox (Mom called it a crate) when no one was home, but since we lived in an apartment and had no yard, I got to go for 3 walks a day! It was pretty cool, especially the walks around the lake where all the geese lived (I tried to get a few, but Mom always stopped me... sheesh). I did get to sleep on the bed with Mom back then, (mainly so she could keep her eye on me when she was sleeping... still don't know how she does that), but now I have my own bed (I like my space when I sleep, and Mom and the DeeLan take up too much room... maybe if they get that King sized bed Mom's always talking about...) It was a fun time of shredding toys and going to new places.
It took me a while to learn the ropes, but I got to spend all kinds of time at my Gram-Mom's house, and was introduced to the CaNinja society through Chloe. I thought it would be like that furever, but Mom had other plans. Next thing I know, Mom is packing up all our stuff, my dog toys, my bed, my dogbox, and she took us to this new house. Now, I was happy with the apartment, but this house had a YARD!!! It was a little yard, but still, I could go outside and lay in the sun, or snow, or dig big holes, or chase the stoopid bunnies out of my yard, or watch the other dogs walk by on the sidewalk next to the house. It was AWESOME! Only one catch came with the new house... the stoopid foster dogs. Sigh... there I was, the utmost center of attention of my Mom, and she decides to start bringing in this never-ending line of foster dogs. See, Mom had decided that since a husky rescue had helped me find her that she wanted to foster dogs so they could find their furever homes too. The first one was Stout (you remember, the goofy looking husky-mutt from my adoption... he had been adopted the day I was, but was returned a year later 'cause his new Mom was having a baby and didn't want him anymore... humans can be weird sometimes). He was fun, I'll give you that, but he had this annoying habit of trying to eat my head.
As you can see here the idiot is trying to fit my entire neck in his mouth. Not the brightest light on the billboard, but he was fun. He was adopted a little while later by Bean's Dad, who lived down the street. Bean's Dad (and this is just twisted) owned a dog wash. Now, I like Bean's Dad a lot, but what type of aberrant soul does it take to own an establishment made for nothing but the torture of poor, innocent dogs?!?!?!? Stout used to go with him the dog wash (but from what I hear, he never got washed there, he just ran the check-out counter... not surprising since we ARE a working breed...)
Okay... that's all for now. I need to go get ready for Mom to come home (as in, looking innocent and justwokenup by her coming in the door).
Official HULA Membership!
I have officially been inducted into HULA!!
Formal Application For HULA Membership:
I, Frodo K. Banks, Husky Ninja in Training, do hereby apply for membership of the Husky United Liberation Army (HULA). Below is my official list of qualifications (other than being a Husky):
1. Demonstrating disruptive behavior:
As part of my Husky Ninja Training, I am required to be as stealthy as possible, and observe without being observed, so for the most part I am not allowed to be disruptive. However, this rule goes out the window at dog washes. Grrrrr... I HATE baths. So I make sure to scream bloody murder every time Mom touches me, or brushes me, or moves me, or the water's too cold, or hot, or wet... Mom is constantly apologizing for me. And by the time we leave, the dog wash employees are either looking quite haggard (from running over every time I scream) or ready to call animal services to report the mean lady who abuses her dog in the dog wash. I do look pretty good after my bath, though, ifIdosaysomyself...
2. Cause your human to freak out for no real reason:
One of my requirements for Husky Ninja training is to practice the art of extreme surprise, so I do this quite often. In fact, just last night, my Mom took me for a long walk and when we walked in the house, I immediately went to the kitchen and started bleeding all over the place. Talk about freaking out!!! My Mom looks down and I am standing there perfectly still and there is blood everywhere! The kitchen looked like a murder scene!!! And to make it even better, she couldn't figure out where the blood was coming from, so she kept trying to wipe off spots, but more would appear; it was all over the floor, the rug, the cabinets, my paws, my face, my ears, my neck... she was FREAKED (don't worry fellow huskies, I simply tore my ear a bit on a thorn bush, but I kept shaking my head and that sent the blood flying all over the place!) Harr Harrrrooooo... pretty funny.
3. Cause human guilt for no reason, other to get attention or treats:
I have gotten pretty good at the woebegone look of dismay that makes Mom and the DeeLan feel uber guilty and take me to the dogpark. I give them this look...
... and it's all over. We're going to the dogpark!!!
4. Destroy something:
I was going to provide a picture of the evidence of my destructive tendencies, but Mom confiscated them all 'cause she said it would be 'offensive'. I belong to UEA (Undie Eaters Anonymous). My name is Frodo and I eat undies. I have been clean for 2 months (but only because the humans have been good about putting the clothes in the wood box they call a 'hamper'). Once, I went through an entire pile of laundry waiting to be washed and pulled out every pair of undies and shredded them. I went through 7 pairs of undies in 10 minutes, that's how bad my addiction was. I went through rehab and am hopefully on the road to recovery, but it's a long hard road, as you other clothing addicts are aware, so I attend UEA meetings weekly.
But, hey! I'm also good at shredding and gutting a stuffie in less than 30 seconds!
4. Human behavior modification:
My Mom used to be a decent sleeper, but then I adopted her, and now a pin drop would wake the woman. See, I have an upset tummy sometimes (I have IBS), and sometimes I just have to get up at night to go potty. So, I've trained her to wake at the slightest jingle of my collar to make sure that she gets up to let me out. My predecessor, Bean, also trained my Mom to wake up at the sound of his breathing... he was good! When he had to go potty, he'd sit next to the bed and breathe really heavy, and that would wake her up, but not his Dad, so she'd always have to take him out. Harrrrroooo.
5. Being dressed up as something for the humor of the humans:
Need I say more? But wait, there is more...
Can you believe they had the nerve to dress HUSKIES up in coats? In Sandy Egg-O of all places!!! At least they didn't make us wear them at the beach. That would have been too much humiliation to bear. As you can see, I am clearly protesting this demeaning act (while my suck-up cousin, Clemmie, is just eating it up. She loves getting dressed up and lets her Mom, Auntie HiDeeHo, do it all the time!!! She'll never be a HULA member.)
5. Love of Kleenex:
Although I do not eat Kleenex (as you saw above, I prefer richer material), I do like to take them out of the trashcan and distribute them all over the house. No real reason other than to make my Mom think that DeeLan is leaving his dirty Kleenex on the floor everywhere. Hee hee... I had her going for weeks, but I think she might have caught on by now.
Please accept this letter to apply for the HULA, your forever vigilant servant, in the open, and in the shadows of the CaNinja societies,
Frodo K. Banks
Formal Application For HULA Membership:
I, Frodo K. Banks, Husky Ninja in Training, do hereby apply for membership of the Husky United Liberation Army (HULA). Below is my official list of qualifications (other than being a Husky):
1. Demonstrating disruptive behavior:
As part of my Husky Ninja Training, I am required to be as stealthy as possible, and observe without being observed, so for the most part I am not allowed to be disruptive. However, this rule goes out the window at dog washes. Grrrrr... I HATE baths. So I make sure to scream bloody murder every time Mom touches me, or brushes me, or moves me, or the water's too cold, or hot, or wet... Mom is constantly apologizing for me. And by the time we leave, the dog wash employees are either looking quite haggard (from running over every time I scream) or ready to call animal services to report the mean lady who abuses her dog in the dog wash. I do look pretty good after my bath, though, ifIdosaysomyself...
2. Cause your human to freak out for no real reason:
One of my requirements for Husky Ninja training is to practice the art of extreme surprise, so I do this quite often. In fact, just last night, my Mom took me for a long walk and when we walked in the house, I immediately went to the kitchen and started bleeding all over the place. Talk about freaking out!!! My Mom looks down and I am standing there perfectly still and there is blood everywhere! The kitchen looked like a murder scene!!! And to make it even better, she couldn't figure out where the blood was coming from, so she kept trying to wipe off spots, but more would appear; it was all over the floor, the rug, the cabinets, my paws, my face, my ears, my neck... she was FREAKED (don't worry fellow huskies, I simply tore my ear a bit on a thorn bush, but I kept shaking my head and that sent the blood flying all over the place!) Harr Harrrrooooo... pretty funny.
3. Cause human guilt for no reason, other to get attention or treats:
I have gotten pretty good at the woebegone look of dismay that makes Mom and the DeeLan feel uber guilty and take me to the dogpark. I give them this look...
... and it's all over. We're going to the dogpark!!!
4. Destroy something:
I was going to provide a picture of the evidence of my destructive tendencies, but Mom confiscated them all 'cause she said it would be 'offensive'. I belong to UEA (Undie Eaters Anonymous). My name is Frodo and I eat undies. I have been clean for 2 months (but only because the humans have been good about putting the clothes in the wood box they call a 'hamper'). Once, I went through an entire pile of laundry waiting to be washed and pulled out every pair of undies and shredded them. I went through 7 pairs of undies in 10 minutes, that's how bad my addiction was. I went through rehab and am hopefully on the road to recovery, but it's a long hard road, as you other clothing addicts are aware, so I attend UEA meetings weekly.
But, hey! I'm also good at shredding and gutting a stuffie in less than 30 seconds!
4. Human behavior modification:
My Mom used to be a decent sleeper, but then I adopted her, and now a pin drop would wake the woman. See, I have an upset tummy sometimes (I have IBS), and sometimes I just have to get up at night to go potty. So, I've trained her to wake at the slightest jingle of my collar to make sure that she gets up to let me out. My predecessor, Bean, also trained my Mom to wake up at the sound of his breathing... he was good! When he had to go potty, he'd sit next to the bed and breathe really heavy, and that would wake her up, but not his Dad, so she'd always have to take him out. Harrrrroooo.
5. Being dressed up as something for the humor of the humans:
Need I say more? But wait, there is more...
Can you believe they had the nerve to dress HUSKIES up in coats? In Sandy Egg-O of all places!!! At least they didn't make us wear them at the beach. That would have been too much humiliation to bear. As you can see, I am clearly protesting this demeaning act (while my suck-up cousin, Clemmie, is just eating it up. She loves getting dressed up and lets her Mom, Auntie HiDeeHo, do it all the time!!! She'll never be a HULA member.)
5. Love of Kleenex:
Although I do not eat Kleenex (as you saw above, I prefer richer material), I do like to take them out of the trashcan and distribute them all over the house. No real reason other than to make my Mom think that DeeLan is leaving his dirty Kleenex on the floor everywhere. Hee hee... I had her going for weeks, but I think she might have caught on by now.
Please accept this letter to apply for the HULA, your forever vigilant servant, in the open, and in the shadows of the CaNinja societies,
Frodo K. Banks
The Claw doesn't work at my house
I'm pouting.
So, my Mom was giving me a nice scratch with her long nails, right in that spot behind my ear that I like a lot, and then 'cause she was talking to the DeeLan, she stopped. No warning, no good reason, just stopped. I figured that I'd try the method of the Claw (from my friend Meeshka) to let her know that stopping the scratching wasn't acceptable. So, with no warning, I Clawed her good right on the chest and chin. But you know what?!?!? Not only did she NOT realize the error of her ways and pay full attention to me, but she pushed me away, called me a BADDOG, and told me that she wasn't going to pay attention to me until I behaved myself!!! Can you believe that?!?!? I WAS behaving myself, and enjoying the scratching, thankyouverymuch, and she had the nerve to STOP. Sheesh. So, I went to my bed and did my best I'mmadatyou'causeyou'reaverymeanMom look. I don't even think she noticed. As good of an idea as the Claw is, and as great as it seems to work for other Huskies, I think I got a stupid Claw-proof Mom. Figures. Maybe next time I'll try Clawing the DeeLan instead. Maybe that will work?
She did take me for a long walk later, though... so I guess I forgive her. For now.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
The reason my Mom loves Huskies
So, when my Mom was living in West Virgin-Yah, she lived with this human man who had a Husky named Bean.
(This is Bean after a bath... notice his impressive fluffiness. In the background is a picture Mom painted of Bean... she liked him a LOT)
My Mom loved Bean so much, that when she moved to Merry Land, she wanted to be around Huskies (who can blame her), so she decided to let one adopt her. Along came ME!!!! She and Bean had a lot of fun times together in West Virgin-Yah and a place called Boulder (from what I gather, Boulder is Dogheaven: it snows there all the time, Dogs are allowed everywhere, even in restaurants, there are hiking trails and bunny fields as far as the eye can see, and it's just the best place EVER). I'd like to go live in Boulder sometime, but Mom says we have to stay in Sandy Egg-O for a while longer. Sigh. It's not so bad here, there is just no snow - although, my Mom told me that she had a dream last night that it snowed here! Maybe she's a fortune teller and it's coming?
(This is Bean after a bath... notice his impressive fluffiness. In the background is a picture Mom painted of Bean... she liked him a LOT)
My Mom loved Bean so much, that when she moved to Merry Land, she wanted to be around Huskies (who can blame her), so she decided to let one adopt her. Along came ME!!!! She and Bean had a lot of fun times together in West Virgin-Yah and a place called Boulder (from what I gather, Boulder is Dogheaven: it snows there all the time, Dogs are allowed everywhere, even in restaurants, there are hiking trails and bunny fields as far as the eye can see, and it's just the best place EVER). I'd like to go live in Boulder sometime, but Mom says we have to stay in Sandy Egg-O for a while longer. Sigh. It's not so bad here, there is just no snow - although, my Mom told me that she had a dream last night that it snowed here! Maybe she's a fortune teller and it's coming?
Friday, January 19, 2007
Weekend madness
Sorry I've been gone for a bit, it was a pretty crazy weekend. Mom and the DeeLan had another party, and I had to supervise to make sure everyone behaved themselves. They started a fire in this metal thing in the backyard and everyone sat around it for hours. I was a little annoyed as they had the human muse-ACK playing so loud inside that I couldn't sleep on my bed in the living room, so I had to curl up in the leaves in the backyard. The humans were nice enough to have a pile of tasty sticks laying next to the metal-fire-thing that I was able to chew, so that was cool. And several of the humans were nice enough to let me know when they dropped tasty food on the floor (my Mom told them to do that... she must realize I work much better than the stinky wet thing she rubs on the floor sometimes).
I guess my Mom saw my cousin Clemmie over the weekend because she left me a smell-O-gram on my Mom. She says she's doing well, enjoying 'living it up' as she says, with Auntie HiDeeHo. She's such a suck-up, she loves having Auntie all to herself, and I'm sure she gets away with EVERYthing, considering she's got the snivel-cower-'don't-hurt-me' act down to a 'T'. I swear, that girl is so conniving. She makes everyone think she's afraid of everything so she can get away with anything!! Typical.
Oh yeah! Something else cool. My Mom gave me this big hunk of bread that dropped on the floor when she was getting ready for the party...
I wasn't hungry right then, so I decided to save it for later...
I'll get back to it in a few weeks once it's been nicely cured. Hopefully the stoopid bunnies don't take it, like they always do (at least I think it's the bunnies... could be cats, as they are sneaky thieves as well). If Mom would just let me sleep outside, I could guard my stash, but she makes me sleep inside with her and the DeeLan. Sheesh. Doesn't she know that Husky Ninja's are impervious to cold and wind?
I guess my Mom saw my cousin Clemmie over the weekend because she left me a smell-O-gram on my Mom. She says she's doing well, enjoying 'living it up' as she says, with Auntie HiDeeHo. She's such a suck-up, she loves having Auntie all to herself, and I'm sure she gets away with EVERYthing, considering she's got the snivel-cower-'don't-hurt-me' act down to a 'T'. I swear, that girl is so conniving. She makes everyone think she's afraid of everything so she can get away with anything!! Typical.
Oh yeah! Something else cool. My Mom gave me this big hunk of bread that dropped on the floor when she was getting ready for the party...
I wasn't hungry right then, so I decided to save it for later...
I'll get back to it in a few weeks once it's been nicely cured. Hopefully the stoopid bunnies don't take it, like they always do (at least I think it's the bunnies... could be cats, as they are sneaky thieves as well). If Mom would just let me sleep outside, I could guard my stash, but she makes me sleep inside with her and the DeeLan. Sheesh. Doesn't she know that Husky Ninja's are impervious to cold and wind?
Thursday, January 18, 2007
It's tough being a Rock Star
Man, am I tired. I managed to sneak out while Mom was at that work place and go to a DogRave. It was awesome!!! Tons of flashing lights, glowtoys, lots of DogMosh pits and dogs of all shapes and sizes dancing together! It was great. And of course, not that I have to say it, really, but us Huskies are amazing dancers (Face it, we've got the moves.) Good thing I'm a master at the sneak-in sneak-out tactic, Mom never knew I was gone. Although she did give me some funny looks when she came home... not sure why.
I want SNOW
I agree with Althea... it's no fair that some of us don't get snow. If they are getting snow in Texas, then we should get it here in Sandy Egg-O. My Mom did say that when she went outside this morning, there was a layer of frost on her truck. Wooooooooooo hooo!!! Maybe that means snow is just around the corner??? (the plans for world domination by the NHSCWT - National Husky Society for the Control of World Temperatures - are finally moving forward!!!)
Here's a picture of me from when the NHSCWT successfully tested their 'blizzard bomb' and made it snow 4 feet in Merry Land (where we used to live... I miss it there... they had snow... sigh...)
Here's a picture of me from when the NHSCWT successfully tested their 'blizzard bomb' and made it snow 4 feet in Merry Land (where we used to live... I miss it there... they had snow... sigh...)
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Story of me (part 1)
So, I overheard my Mom talking to a lady about how I found her, and I think it's a pretty neat story, so I thought I might tell it. A lot has happened in my life ('specially now that I'm a whopping 5 yrs old). So, I'll start from the very beginning...
What happened to me when I was a very young pup is a bit of a mystery to my Mom (I mean, I know, but I ain't gonna tell her as some of it is related to how I became destined to be a amazing Husky Ninja, and like with all superheros, their true past must be a mystery). All that is known is that I ended up at dogjail as a young pup of maybe 4-6 months. It was pretty bad there, but a family came by and bailed me out, thinking I was pretty darn cute (which I am). I didn't stay with them very long 'cause I was young and stoopid, and didn't know yet that I was destined to become a Husky Ninja, so I did all those things young huskies have a tendency to do (you know, the standard destroy stuff, play 'ricochet off the human' and 'annoy the small humans till they cry')... Aaaagh, the good ol' days. So yeah, the family sent me back to dogjail, but this time, it was to a jail that only gives you 4 DAYS until you go to theroomfromwhichnodogreturns. [gulp] Luckily for me, the stars knew I was destined to become a Husky Ninja, and I was rescued by a nice lady from TOTTSHR who took me to her house. She had a LOT of other dogs there, and I wanted to play with them really bad, but no sooner than I got there, I was taken on this LONG car ride, in a big van with lots of other Huskies. We met all kinds of people that day, and one of the dogs that was with me was my later-to-be doofus foster brother, Stout.
(As you can see from the picture, he's a big dork... but we'll get to that later.)
So, anyway, we met a few people who were kinda nice, and then got to this house where my Mom's Mom lived. My Mom (of course) was there, and so was my Auntie HiDeeHo and even Stout's later-to-be dad! (as you can see, the stars have a funny way of making things work out... we Huskies understand this, and try to pass our Dog Zen understanding onto the humans, but they are usually oblivious.) I got the inkling that something covert was going on as they took us out of our cages in the van one-by-one and introduced us to the people. See, there were also two other dogs there that owned my Gram-Mom. Now, since I'm pretty smart, and a very quick study, I noticed that they were introducing the Huskies to these two dogs, and if the Husky was nasty and snarfy to the two dogs, they got put back in the cage in the van. But, if they were nice, they got to go run around in a big yard and play. So, since I'm no dummy, I discerned that these two dogs could be secret operatives, and maybe this was a TEST! I knew that this could possibly be a clue into my calling in life, so I made sure to be nice to the two dogs (I even play-bowed to the maledog), and so I got to go play in the big yard. Turns out, the two dogs were really cool, especially the maledog, Brinkley, who's my best pupfriend. Good thing I'm so smart, because turns out Chloe ranks very high in the CaNinja (what we call Dog Ninjas) society. They are the reason I learned of my destiny to become a Husky Ninja... (to be continued...)
What happened to me when I was a very young pup is a bit of a mystery to my Mom (I mean, I know, but I ain't gonna tell her as some of it is related to how I became destined to be a amazing Husky Ninja, and like with all superheros, their true past must be a mystery). All that is known is that I ended up at dogjail as a young pup of maybe 4-6 months. It was pretty bad there, but a family came by and bailed me out, thinking I was pretty darn cute (which I am). I didn't stay with them very long 'cause I was young and stoopid, and didn't know yet that I was destined to become a Husky Ninja, so I did all those things young huskies have a tendency to do (you know, the standard destroy stuff, play 'ricochet off the human' and 'annoy the small humans till they cry')... Aaaagh, the good ol' days. So yeah, the family sent me back to dogjail, but this time, it was to a jail that only gives you 4 DAYS until you go to theroomfromwhichnodogreturns. [gulp] Luckily for me, the stars knew I was destined to become a Husky Ninja, and I was rescued by a nice lady from TOTTSHR who took me to her house. She had a LOT of other dogs there, and I wanted to play with them really bad, but no sooner than I got there, I was taken on this LONG car ride, in a big van with lots of other Huskies. We met all kinds of people that day, and one of the dogs that was with me was my later-to-be doofus foster brother, Stout.
(As you can see from the picture, he's a big dork... but we'll get to that later.)
So, anyway, we met a few people who were kinda nice, and then got to this house where my Mom's Mom lived. My Mom (of course) was there, and so was my Auntie HiDeeHo and even Stout's later-to-be dad! (as you can see, the stars have a funny way of making things work out... we Huskies understand this, and try to pass our Dog Zen understanding onto the humans, but they are usually oblivious.) I got the inkling that something covert was going on as they took us out of our cages in the van one-by-one and introduced us to the people. See, there were also two other dogs there that owned my Gram-Mom. Now, since I'm pretty smart, and a very quick study, I noticed that they were introducing the Huskies to these two dogs, and if the Husky was nasty and snarfy to the two dogs, they got put back in the cage in the van. But, if they were nice, they got to go run around in a big yard and play. So, since I'm no dummy, I discerned that these two dogs could be secret operatives, and maybe this was a TEST! I knew that this could possibly be a clue into my calling in life, so I made sure to be nice to the two dogs (I even play-bowed to the maledog), and so I got to go play in the big yard. Turns out, the two dogs were really cool, especially the maledog, Brinkley, who's my best pupfriend. Good thing I'm so smart, because turns out Chloe ranks very high in the CaNinja (what we call Dog Ninjas) society. They are the reason I learned of my destiny to become a Husky Ninja... (to be continued...)
Monday, January 15, 2007
Too cold? She's nuts.
This weekend was SO boring.
I didn't get to go to the dogpark. I didn't get to play outside (that much). Didn't go hiking or running or ANYthing fun. Mom said something about it being 'too cold' (what is UP with that? She's always complaining since we moved to Sandy Egg-O that she never gets to see snow, and now she's complaining it's too cold?) Little does see know, I am partially responsible for the frigid temperatures (for those Huskies involved in the National Husky Society for the Control of World Temperatures, or NHSCWT, you know what I'm talking about... silly humans... the whole global warming nonsense is a distractionary tactic while we alter the world temperatures to bring back the ice age!! Snow, snow everywhere!!!). She said it was 33 degrees outside the other morning (which sounds wonderful to me), and that is supposedly unheard of for Sandy Egg-O. So, I got to do nothing but lay around while her and the DeeLan left to go do something fun without me. Siiigh.
Friday, January 12, 2007
Falsified photo
Okay, this is obviously a hoax. There is no way this is an actual Chihuahua Ninja as a REAL ninjadog would never allow themselves to be photographed.
Sheesh... the lengths lesserdogs will go to in order to imitate greatness...
In fact, there is substantial evidence that Chihuahuas are scheming with Cats to form an elite fighting force (Ha. That's funny... as if Chihuahua's can do anything other than shiver and look remarkably like squeaky toys). Now, every true Ninja knows that you never give out Ninja training secrets to those not qualified to wield the immense power that being a Ninja entails, so that fact that the Cats are giving this information to stoopid dummy Chihuahua's is proof that they can't be trusted (and are quite shy of logical thought... but we already knew that all felines had a screw loose).
Sheesh... the lengths lesserdogs will go to in order to imitate greatness...
In fact, there is substantial evidence that Chihuahuas are scheming with Cats to form an elite fighting force (Ha. That's funny... as if Chihuahua's can do anything other than shiver and look remarkably like squeaky toys). Now, every true Ninja knows that you never give out Ninja training secrets to those not qualified to wield the immense power that being a Ninja entails, so that fact that the Cats are giving this information to stoopid dummy Chihuahua's is proof that they can't be trusted (and are quite shy of logical thought... but we already knew that all felines had a screw loose).
More on Husky Ninjas...
I was inspired to begin my training to become a Husky Ninja by the most famous human Ninja, the Ninja from 'Ask a Ninja'. One of his podcasts was about a Ninjadog who could do the most amazing things, and I decided right then and there... I would become a Husky Ninja! Since then, I have been in training, trying to hone my Husky Ninja Zen techniques and practice the art of the Ninjadog ancestors (which I think must have been mostly huskies... maybe a few other breeds like Jindos and Shiba Inus, but you can bet your fur there weren't any stoopid dummy Chihuahua Ninjas). It's not for the weak of spirit, as it takes discipline... more so than most dogs can handle. Take for instance the snatching of the human food. I know this is something Huskies are especially good at, as with our speed and cunning, we find it very easy to fool the Sucker humans into [over here, over here] looking this way, and [zoom zooooooom] snatching that way. As a Husky Ninja, you must practice utter discipline and NOT snatch the human food, EVEN when the humans stoopidly leave the room with the food sitting on the coffee table. Do you have any idea how hard that is!?!?! I have almost mastered this technique, although occasionally I will falter and stick my face in the bowl of spaghetti the visiting Sucker left on the table (Mmmm... marinara).
Now, somedogs might say 'You're lame for not snatching the food', but really, how much will power does it take to scream in abject horror so your human comes bolting over to see if you're okay, leaving their food unprotected so you can jump up, fly around the couch, over the TV stand and snatch the sandwich off the plate before they can say 'WTF?!?!?!?' You see, as a Husky Ninja, it is the strength of will that allows me to sit there, eye to eye with the mouthwateringyummycheesymeaty sandwich and not even give it a little taste as my human walks away. How's that for will power?
It's all part of my plan, fellowhuskies, and as I progress in my blogging, I will reveal more of the master plan of the Husky Ninjas and how we ultimately will take over the world with the help of HULA and other important societies. In the meantime, remember the first thing a Husky Ninja must master is the stare down... that look that sends fear into the hearts of lesserdogs and furry creatures... (and sometimes humans, but mostly they just think you want something... we're working on that...)
Now, somedogs might say 'You're lame for not snatching the food', but really, how much will power does it take to scream in abject horror so your human comes bolting over to see if you're okay, leaving their food unprotected so you can jump up, fly around the couch, over the TV stand and snatch the sandwich off the plate before they can say 'WTF?!?!?!?' You see, as a Husky Ninja, it is the strength of will that allows me to sit there, eye to eye with the mouthwateringyummycheesymeaty sandwich and not even give it a little taste as my human walks away. How's that for will power?
It's all part of my plan, fellowhuskies, and as I progress in my blogging, I will reveal more of the master plan of the Husky Ninjas and how we ultimately will take over the world with the help of HULA and other important societies. In the meantime, remember the first thing a Husky Ninja must master is the stare down... that look that sends fear into the hearts of lesserdogs and furry creatures... (and sometimes humans, but mostly they just think you want something... we're working on that...)
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Big Wooooooo
Last night was fun. All kinds of people came over the house and I was happy since most of them were the male humans. I guess you could say I have more of a preference for the male humans... actually, I prefer male dogs too. Girldogs are a big pain in the you-know-what, in my opinion. My Mom says I'd make a great dog for a 'Frat House', whatever that means. Something about a big, dirty house full of male humans and lots of beer and food lying around. If that's the case, who wouldn't want to be a Fratdog!?!?! I mean, I like my Mom and all, and my Gram-Mom is cool too, and I like my Auntie HiDeeHo since she lets me get away with anything, but male humans are just more fun. Like take my Dee-Lan (he's the male human that lives with us now), he's the BEST! Before we lived with him, I had to spend all day by myself, but now he hangs out with me most of the time, and we do guy stuff. Makes me a lot happier to have someone to hang out with (plus, he gives me cereal and lunch meat and all kinds of good people food... but Shhhhhhh, don't tell Mom).
But yeah, so back to stoopid girldogs... case in point: last night this lady came over and brought her girldog. She was pretty fun, although her lady was really protective of her (guess she doesn't know dog language very well... being snarky and yipping with tails wagging means 'Let's Play', not 'I Want to Kill You'). We had fun play-bowing and batting each other in the face, and of course, the best game 'get under the table and wrestle' (for some reason the humans don't like that one. Huh...) But while the humans were outside, the stoopid girldog peed on the rug, and no one saw it! So when my Mom came home today, she finds the rug all wet with old pee and blames ME!!! I can't tell you how many times I've gotten in trouble for stoopid dumb girldogs peeing on stuff! Sheesh. I think Mom figured it out later, but I still got the whole 'What did you do?' and had to stay outside for like 30 whole minutes. I mean, I NEVER pee on stuff (ummm... okay, so maybe I did a little when I first lived with my mom, but I was testing her, you know how it goes...). But for some reason, ALL the girldogs that come into our houses pee everywhere! My cousin Clemmie peed on just about everything 'cause she wanted to try and make it hers. Whatever...
So, besides the stoopid girldog peeing on the rug, I did get a lot of good food like hotdog and cheese. One of the male humans tried to give me a chip even thought my Mom told him I wouldn't eat it, so I spit it out on his foot. That'll show him. I also got in a few good really impressive Woo's, but Mom told me I had to use my 'inside voice' (that's her way of saying 'Be Quiet' when there's company). I almost got some hamburger too, but none of my impressive Woo's convinced anyone that I deserved a whole hamburger patty. What a waste of a good Woo. Although, there must have been some left, since Mom's cooking them again tonight....
...wait, did I hear the oven open?
...False alarm. Well, I behaved myself other than that (always practicing my Husky Ninja Zen techniques, even at parties), and like I always say 'Walk softly and carry a big WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!'
But yeah, so back to stoopid girldogs... case in point: last night this lady came over and brought her girldog. She was pretty fun, although her lady was really protective of her (guess she doesn't know dog language very well... being snarky and yipping with tails wagging means 'Let's Play', not 'I Want to Kill You'). We had fun play-bowing and batting each other in the face, and of course, the best game 'get under the table and wrestle' (for some reason the humans don't like that one. Huh...) But while the humans were outside, the stoopid girldog peed on the rug, and no one saw it! So when my Mom came home today, she finds the rug all wet with old pee and blames ME!!! I can't tell you how many times I've gotten in trouble for stoopid dumb girldogs peeing on stuff! Sheesh. I think Mom figured it out later, but I still got the whole 'What did you do?' and had to stay outside for like 30 whole minutes. I mean, I NEVER pee on stuff (ummm... okay, so maybe I did a little when I first lived with my mom, but I was testing her, you know how it goes...). But for some reason, ALL the girldogs that come into our houses pee everywhere! My cousin Clemmie peed on just about everything 'cause she wanted to try and make it hers. Whatever...
So, besides the stoopid girldog peeing on the rug, I did get a lot of good food like hotdog and cheese. One of the male humans tried to give me a chip even thought my Mom told him I wouldn't eat it, so I spit it out on his foot. That'll show him. I also got in a few good really impressive Woo's, but Mom told me I had to use my 'inside voice' (that's her way of saying 'Be Quiet' when there's company). I almost got some hamburger too, but none of my impressive Woo's convinced anyone that I deserved a whole hamburger patty. What a waste of a good Woo. Although, there must have been some left, since Mom's cooking them again tonight....
...wait, did I hear the oven open?
...False alarm. Well, I behaved myself other than that (always practicing my Husky Ninja Zen techniques, even at parties), and like I always say 'Walk softly and carry a big WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!'
Tuesday, January 9, 2007
The beginning...
Frodo here (that's me in the front of the picture with my goofy cousin behind me, wooing her head off as usual)... my Mom said that she's been reading a lot of these 'blog' things lately, and that with my wit and sarcastic nature, I'd be a good 'blogger'. I figured what the fur, I've got a few interesting things to say. And since I AM a husky, the king of all dog breeds, what I have to say may inspire some (and strike fear into the hearts of others). Plus, I'm hoping that this 'blogging' (what a weird name for something that's just basically talking...) will give me credits towards becoming a member of HULA (Husky United Liberation Army). I am in training to become a master manipulator currently, as well as a Husky Ninja (more on that later) and wish to pass on my knowledge to this fantastic organization in hopes of assisting Huskies everywhere in taking over the world.
First off, I'd like to send a shout out to some fellow rescue huskies, Loki and Sam, the step-brothers of Meeshka from Meeshka's World blog. Mom says Meeshka is who inspired her to have me start my own blog as us rescue dogs don't get enough respect. (No offense Meeshka, as I think you are the righteous Queen of the blog!) Loki and I met once at a rescue 'function', and we tried to impress our Moms by showing how tough we were and getting all snarky with each other, but humans don't know impressive displays when they see them, so they made us stop. {rolls eyes}Whatever.
I have to go (time to patrol the house for burglers, hidden squeaky balls and bugs) , but I'll try to post more if I can get on the computer tonight when Mom is having something called a Bar-Bee-Que. Don't know what that is exactly, but she cleaned the house, which means lots of people coming over (although, it also sometimes means she bored, or angry, or avoiding doing something else... who knows with this woman, she's a clean freak). So, lots of people coming over means lots of food. And since most people are just big Suckers, they have a tendency to give me the food. I haven't quite mastered Meeska's 'look cute and fluffy' to get food from the Suckers, as I'm not very fluffy. Normally I practice my Husky Ninja Zen techniques when the humans have food, and ignore them completely (all part of the plan to manipulate them), but when the non-husky savvy Suckers come over, I just can't resist. I mean, seriously, huskies can tell the difference between a husky savvy person and a Sucker from a MILE away. It's like they have a big 'S' on their forehead or something. Anyway, they'll give me food, none the wiser that I am not a typicaldog. It's nice to get a break from my training every once and a while. Mastering the true Husky Ninja Zen is not easy, let me tell you...
First off, I'd like to send a shout out to some fellow rescue huskies, Loki and Sam, the step-brothers of Meeshka from Meeshka's World blog. Mom says Meeshka is who inspired her to have me start my own blog as us rescue dogs don't get enough respect. (No offense Meeshka, as I think you are the righteous Queen of the blog!) Loki and I met once at a rescue 'function', and we tried to impress our Moms by showing how tough we were and getting all snarky with each other, but humans don't know impressive displays when they see them, so they made us stop. {rolls eyes}
I have to go (time to patrol the house for burglers, hidden squeaky balls and bugs) , but I'll try to post more if I can get on the computer tonight when Mom is having something called a Bar-Bee-Que. Don't know what that is exactly, but she cleaned the house, which means lots of people coming over (although, it also sometimes means she bored, or angry, or avoiding doing something else... who knows with this woman, she's a clean freak). So, lots of people coming over means lots of food. And since most people are just big Suckers, they have a tendency to give me the food. I haven't quite mastered Meeska's 'look cute and fluffy' to get food from the Suckers, as I'm not very fluffy. Normally I practice my Husky Ninja Zen techniques when the humans have food, and ignore them completely (all part of the plan to manipulate them), but when the non-husky savvy Suckers come over, I just can't resist. I mean, seriously, huskies can tell the difference between a husky savvy person and a Sucker from a MILE away. It's like they have a big 'S' on their forehead or something. Anyway, they'll give me food, none the wiser that I am not a typicaldog. It's nice to get a break from my training every once and a while. Mastering the true Husky Ninja Zen is not easy, let me tell you...
Later, Frodo
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